My College Story

Ahh... sweet, sweet college days.

Those all-nighters get to you pretty fast, you can't even remember the last time you slept.

I'm currently in my third year of college and, if God permits, I'll be done in a year and a half. Yeah, I have to spend an extra semester for the required coursework. I'm planning to be a CPA (Certified Public Accountant). All that extra work will hopefully pay off.

I realize, every semester just gets tougher and tougher. This semester has actually been my worst so far. I could not believe how much pressure I'm in right now. I've broken my all-nighter records this semester (finished at 7 AM, woke up at 7:20 AM for class). Yet somehow, I always feel disappointed about myself. I'm a failure when it comes to time management.

How do you survive college?

I always end up wrecking my schedule. I'm afraid of taking too much commitments and ending up not being able to fulfill them. Sometimes, I look at my high school friends studying in the Philippines and I feel bad that I can't expand my horizons as easily as they can. Somehow, for me, things are just a tad harder here than they are back home.

Studying college in a town of 20,000 or so people does not help either. Hays is a microcity: you know, a city that's not exactly a city. To put it bluntly, my university is majorly white. There are occurrences where I'm the only 'colored' student. Does that bother me? Not at all. Sometimes, I put that to my advantage by doing my best to stand out. Actually, it does not take much to stand out in a university of roughly 3 Filipino students. You're one who easily sticks out of your professor's head with a first name.

I can easily decide to move to other universities if I wish. In fact, I can move back to Texas with my parents, not have to live in an apartment, not have to think about what I'd eat for the day, or what bills to pay; but I choose not to. Somehow, my school has left an indelible mark in my heart. It taught me how to stand on my own two feet.

However, it's not all that easy. In fact, to be honest, I feel very 'underaccomplished'. After what I've gone through back in my high school heydays, I couldn't seem to duplicate my accomplishments. I'm not necessarily a failure, but I feel like there's so much more I am capable of doing, but I choose not to extend my reach.

It could be due to the fact that fitting in becomes such an arduous task in itself. I'm an individual who relies on companionship--I succeed better when I am with friends. I don't like doing things by myself. My courage comes from the people I spend time with. They push me to succeed. In fact, my friends--and everyone else I personally know--are my mentors.

Unfortunately, I am left with no choice. I have to do it by myself. I may not be able to exceed expectations (even my own), but I will definitely not be a let down, especially to my parents--who I offer all my success to. They are the reason I'm doing this, because I don't want to let them down. I want to be a son they can truly be proud of.

When I think into the future, I always wonder if I will ever get the chance to walk up on stage again and do a speech like I did in high school. Perhaps not. I may end up just like most everybody--walking up the stage, getting my diploma, taking a picture with my folks, and heading back down. But it's all good. My success is not measured by the opportunity to address hundreds of graduates; it is measured by the hard work and prayers I put in to achieve it.

No matter what I accomplish, and no matter what success or failure I go through in college, I will always bring everything back to God. He's the reason I'm still alive after all the sleepless nights of studying. He's the reason why my work has always paid off. Last but not least, He's the reason why I will be stepping out of college a successful person.

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Logan, the Sky Angel Cowboy

I got this forwarded to my inbox and I was touched and amazed. You would never look at the situation the way Logan, the Sky Angel Cowboy, put it.

I encourage you to watch the video after the jump.



Now isn't that just amazing to come from a 13 year-old boy? The meaning of "purpose" has never been this clear.

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Salamat?

Ala-singko na ng umaga ako natulog kahapon. May tinulungan akong grupo ng mga tao dahil hindi sila bihasa sa pinapagawa nila. Kahit na ang dami-dami kong dapat gawin ngayong weekend, isinantabi ko lahat ng iyon para sa kanila. Lahat ng plano ko nasira. Hindi naman ako nagreklamo, okay lang. Importante, matulungan ko sila at masimulan na nila yung dapat nilang gawin.

Nang ako'y patulog na, sumagi sa isip ko ang konsepto ng pagpapasalamat. Sa labas, hindi ako umaasang pasasalamatan ako, pero sa loob-loob ko, alam kong matapos ang paghihirap ko -- limang oras kong ginawa yung pagtulong sa kanila -- I deserve to be credited and thanked. Hindi ako umaasa na bigyan ako ng kahit anong malaking bagay. Pagpapasalamat lang ang inaasahan ko. Nasabi ko sa sarili ko, "pihadong ikasasakit ng loob ko kung madatnan kong hindi man lang nila ako pinasalamatan." Dahil doon, natulog ako na nag-aalala sa kung anong mangyayari kinabukasan.

I know that expecting for something in return is not a good thing, pero I don't think expecting a word of appreciation for what you've done, if you deserve it, is improper. Mali ba ang umasang pasasalamatan nila ako?

Kinabukasan, bumungad sa akin ang kinatatakutan ko. Unang-una nilang pinagmalaki ang mga pagbabago na naidulot ng pagtulong ko sa kanila. Binusisi ko ang kanilang anunsiyo, at gaya ng inaasahan ko, ni pahapyaw ay wala man lang akong naramdamang kabayaran sa pinaghirapan ko. Wala akong natanggap na pagpapasalamat. Are they taking credit on my behalf? I hope not. I do not think ill of them, but I am very frustrated that this happened.

Bigla kong naalala ang post ni Bochong sa blog niya. Pareho kami ng problema. Kahit hindi kami umaasa ng kapalit, we want to be appreciated for what we do. Gaya ng sabi ni Bochong:

"Madalas nagpapakumbaba ako ngunit sa kaloob-looban, I want to be appreciated. Kahit mga payak na bagay, I want to be praised. Ang sakit sa pakiramdam kapag walang nagsasabing 'Ang galing mo naman!' o 'Ang bait mo naman!' pagkatapos mo gumawa ng something worth it to be appreciated or praised."

- Bochong, pinoy-bochong.blogspot.com

Totoo pala talaga. Ang sakit! Kahit sinasabi mo sa sarili mo na hindi ka umaasa ng kapalit, sa loob mo may umaasang kahit papaano'y maa-appreciate ka sa mga ginagawa mo. Hindi naman kailangang ipangalandakan nilang magaling o mabait ako. Simple lang ang gusto ko -- matuto silang magsabi ng "salamat."

Ang pinakamahalaga ngunit pinakamurang paraan ng pagpapakita ng utang ng loob ay ang pagpapasalamat. Hindi naman siguro nakakabawas ng galing nila kung sabihin nilang hindi sila ang gumawa noon at na humingi sila ng tulong sa iba. Kailangan pa bang ipaalala ang pagpapasalamat? At ang mas matimbang pa, kailangan bang manggaling pa ang pagpapaalalang 'yon sa mismong pasasalamatan?

Nagawa ko na rin ang pagtulong na ito sa ibang tao, at parehong-pareho ang problema sa mga tinulungan ko kahapon. Bakit yung nauna'y pinasalamatan ako nang lubos? Ang sarap sa pakiramdam na ang pagtulong mo ay may malaking kontribusyon at halaga sa ibang tao, pero ang sakit sa pakiramdam na alam mong malaking tulong sa kanila ang ginawa mo, pero ni hindi man lang sila nagpasalamat.

Nasaktan ako. Hindi ako galit, at wala akong kinagagalitan. Malapit sa akin ang isa sa mga taong tinulungan ko kaya't kahit nasira lahat ng plano ko ay hindi iyon naging problema o balakid sa akin. Sana lang makapulot sila ng aral sa nangyaring ito. Papatawarin ko sila kung natuto sila sa pagkakamali nila, at hindi sa kaalamang pinasalamatan na nila ako. Huli na para magpahabol pa.

Sana lahat tayo'y may natutunan sa pangyayaring ito; na sa kahit anumang bagay o tulong na ipakita o ibahagi sa atin ng ibang tao, matuto tayong magsabi ng salamat.

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Failure

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw that I failed the VITA Basic Certification test. It was easy--at least I thought it was. But somehow, I snickered a bit when I first saw I was one item away from passing it. Anyway, I know I have two tries before I am required to take a retest. I will certainly do my best on the second try.

Everything seems to be fine, but deep inside I am not satisfied. Hey, after all, I failed.

Before I go on, you should probably be oriented about this whole test I'm talking about. VITA (Volunteer Income Tax Assistance) is a program designed for accountants and accounting majors who are willing to volunteer their time to file income taxes and returns for people with low income for free. Before you can become a VITA Volunteer, you have to pass at least two tests (Basic and Intermediate) to get your certification. Apparently, I already failed on the Basic test. Bummer.

It was understandable. I just gave it a shot. I wasn't even sure I did everything right on the tax forms. I know that, coupled with a review of my notes, I will be able to pass it on my second try. But above all that, I am more concerned about the feeling that came over me when I saw that I failed on my first try. To be honest, I have not had a taste of failure for such a long time.

Just when you think all is well, thinking you're a foolproof system that could ace through any kind of test on the first try, you fail. It was tough to swallow, and until now, I am somewhat disturbed. God has given me a simple reminder, a hint, that I'm just like everyone else--I fail if I don't try hard enough.

I should probably put more time and emphasis on the things that will help me attain a promising future, and bother less for the things that won't help me at all. After all, I'm staring at my monitor at 4 in the morning typing this blog.

I've been mistaken for quite a while. Since the day I stepped in my college shoes, I managed my problems by cramming, procrastinating, and wasting time. I always thought of it as my secret formula for success. It isn't.

If you feel like you have lived and succeeded by cramming through every single task assigned to you, then you might want to re-consider. Succeeding in life takes long hours of study, perseverance, and most of all, an abundance of faith in God. All it takes for you to slip, not make it, and ruin your life forever is one slight failure. Think about it.

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Philippines: The Perfect Perspective

Isn't that just beautiful? Behind the politics, corruption, crime, and pollution is a beautiful, beautiful country. It is very unfair how Metro Manila seems to represent the entirety of our country's image when there's so much more beauty left out there.

We should all be the first tourists of our own country. Explore the beauty of the Philippines. Make it an oath.

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